Perfect Madness
Do you know the book, Perfect Madness? Or at least the concept? If not here it is:
today's stay at home mom is like no other. we were raised (mostly) in the late sixties and early seventies by products of the women's lib movement. What does that mean exactly - it means we were told we "could do anything we want in life" - we "can be anything we want" -
so we did - many of us started out our adult lives with 'high-power' jobs, college degrees - trying to be everything. and that is when it hit us - the most important things in life - come from family. So we started a family and the problem is we try to apply that same theory "you can be anything - you can do anything" - to mommyhood. We sign our kids up for all the best preschools - because let's face it that is the only way they will get into HARVARD, right? we make sure they have plenty of playdates. We sign them up for foreign language, sign language and speech lessons.... trying to give them the best the world has to offer. At the same time we require the best of us - we must have our "own" lives, our own friends and interests... and we must we the BEST.
All I can say is it is scary when a group of these same type of mom's get together. you hear things like "oh, is little johnney a 'slow talker?' My little Jenny can speak four languages already"
Anyways, I am stressed because Ben and I are in a coop preschool again this year and sometimes you have to face women like this. I am the 'Chair" of the board of the coop thsi year (because I am trying to do it all :)) and I have to lead the first parent meeting tonight. I am nervous about meeting some of these moms, whom I have already had run-ins via email.
At least I will have one of my best friends, Jen, by my side tonight...
Wish me luck okay? This is not rocket-science for goodness sake :)
today's stay at home mom is like no other. we were raised (mostly) in the late sixties and early seventies by products of the women's lib movement. What does that mean exactly - it means we were told we "could do anything we want in life" - we "can be anything we want" -
so we did - many of us started out our adult lives with 'high-power' jobs, college degrees - trying to be everything. and that is when it hit us - the most important things in life - come from family. So we started a family and the problem is we try to apply that same theory "you can be anything - you can do anything" - to mommyhood. We sign our kids up for all the best preschools - because let's face it that is the only way they will get into HARVARD, right? we make sure they have plenty of playdates. We sign them up for foreign language, sign language and speech lessons.... trying to give them the best the world has to offer. At the same time we require the best of us - we must have our "own" lives, our own friends and interests... and we must we the BEST.
All I can say is it is scary when a group of these same type of mom's get together. you hear things like "oh, is little johnney a 'slow talker?' My little Jenny can speak four languages already"
Anyways, I am stressed because Ben and I are in a coop preschool again this year and sometimes you have to face women like this. I am the 'Chair" of the board of the coop thsi year (because I am trying to do it all :)) and I have to lead the first parent meeting tonight. I am nervous about meeting some of these moms, whom I have already had run-ins via email.
At least I will have one of my best friends, Jen, by my side tonight...
Wish me luck okay? This is not rocket-science for goodness sake :)
posted by JL @ 1:39 PM
4 Comments:
At 3:08 PM,
Karen said…
Good Luck JL. you will do great. If you ever need a good dose of perspective you can come over and take a look at mullet girl who has to "learn" how to ride a bicycle (someone told me how most kids just know these things), and Sebastian who at 9 months old is still a lump... oh yah... and he hasn't said a word yet ;-)
You have a wonderful perfect little boy and you can tell those annoying moms to stop projecting their insecurities onto their children.
At 4:36 PM,
Anonymous said…
JL, you will be terrific. Please know that these women most likely suffer from severe insecurities themselves. Everyone is screwed up in some way, KWIM?
I love ya!
At 1:26 AM,
Bek said…
JL - I can SO relate to the theme of the book you were talking about. At the moment I'm struggling with "why am I so tired all the time and my house is still a mess". Gee...maybe it's because I stay up working until 2 or 3 am and still get up with Anna. ;-)
You'll do great tonight! I'm sure you'll win them over. Try not to take the 'negative' ones to heart. You're a wonderful mommy!
At 7:58 AM,
Anonymous said…
Ah, the struggle for perfection. I am a victim, too. We need a "survivor's of the struggle" t-shirt. I hope not to pass the need to be everything to everyone on to my girls (and boys), so I have tried to be less "perfect" and more accessable. I won't know if it worked for abouther 14 years or so. I'll let you know. :)
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